For the Love of Creatures


Last week I was driving down a steep hill on the motorway when something white on the lane inside caught my eye. At first it looked like a torn white plastic bag – the kind one gets from a kebab house or chippie. Then, as I got closer, I saw some cars in front swerving to avoid it. The true misery of the situation then revealed itself.

The white array was a white dove stood next to the squashed corpse of its partner. The dove was not dazed or injured. It seemed upset and suicidal. The look on its face was unforgettable. Haunting. It clearly wanted to be hit – to join the spirit of its other half. It was scared but sufficiently distraught to stand its ground. Doves in love are truly inseparable – the faithful creatures of Aphrodite. The love-driven desire for self-sacrifice shown by this desolate dove was as remarkable as any sati

No doubt that poor dove was soon granted its death wish. Traffic on the motorway at that time was busy – certainly travelling fast enough to kill. In my rear-view mirror, I saw a truck in the same lane as the bird. It was some hundred metres behind my car and flanked by other vehicles. Its thick tyres would inevitably have sent the white dove into the afterlife, hopefully to reunite with its lover.

Later on that day, thinking about the pair of doves, it dawned on me…

Those who put the rights of creatures above the rights of their fellow man – animal rights extremists and terrorists – are some of the most ridiculous hypocrites on planet earth. They must know that as modern British vehicle-using citizens they engage voluntarily, likely regularly, in the murder of animals and birds. If not, they should connect with Project Splatter and fast educate themselves. Why do they not call for the banning of transport as well as pest control?

If they were one of the acutely-ill ambulance patients on the roads of Britain would they ask to walk? As they travel around the country in buses and cars do they acknowledge the murder of innocent animals they inevitably partake in? On trains do they once raise their heads from their partisan Facebook groups to acknowledge the high-speed rail-kill that they are participating in? Taking a cheap break to Alicante do they know how many birds they knock from the skies? Do they stop and take the knee before blood-spattered wind turbines to pay homage to the many thousands of birds and bats slaughtered each year in the name of the green revolution so many of their number espouse? Do they not see the sense in putting down their cats (some antis have many) – knowing that 55 million birds are killed by domestic cats in the UK each year? Do they not care to think how many tree homes their multi-letter writing campaigns topple, wiping out nests and animal burrows, or how many town foxes are killed as a direct consequence of their heart not head-and-heart approach to rural fox control? Or how many mice and other creatures are caught up in the processing of their vegan diets?

Having the opinion in a free society that grouse shooting is immoral or that fox-hunting is barbarous is legitimate – freedoms of thought and speech are keystones of Britishness. Of course the actual facts of such country pursuits – principally the need for effective land management – are far more nuanced than your average anti’s fundraising video. Land management is merely the hunters’ excuse? The likes of Jim Barrington were minded to quit the League Against Cruel Sports to join their opponents the Countryside Alliance instead because they saw through the antis’ propaganda. (Jim’s The Blindness of Zealots in this magazine is well worth a read).

My particular charge of hypocrisy against the antis lies here instead:

Ever seen a Wild Justice campaign against Stagecoach buses or Virgin Trains? Where are the Chris Packhams of this world holding their vigils outside Halal slaughterhouses? Where are their protests outside the London embassy of the Chinese Government which continues to permit wet markets? Do you ever see Wild Justice protesting outside curry houses in Brick Lane?


The morality of human superiority is undeniable and, at times, vital. Cruel slaughter of animals and birds without reason is reprehensible – as is subjective opposition to pest control when other creatures suffer for the lack of human interventions. By the same arbiter no civilised human being wishes to see a creature’s life wasted – good science and feeding the nation are vital.

If the antis were true to their alleged mission they would protest against all animal cruelty, especially that cruelty which is not cruel-to-be-kind land management. Why go after the low-hanging fruit of land managers and pest controllers who are doing a useful job when – if they genuinely loved and cared about animals – they could civilise whole cultures?

Can we deduce then that animal rights wingnuts are politically-motivated privilege-checkers? Their do-gooder capes mere cloaks of disguise? Like the SNP drones who go after the Scottish aristocracy’s well-managed estates? Like the Chavistas who drove the talented farmers from Venezuela, reducing by land divisions a successful food exporter into a starving importer? Could it be that the ideology that these extremists adhere to is class-driven? Like the watermelons of Extinction Rebellion and the anti-capitalists of Black Lives Matter are these so-called animal rights extremists truly defending animals, or attacking human beings who they see as privileged; who they cannot outdo and thus are covetous of instead? Class warriors and their useful idiots? Are not these men and women, whether they comprehend the term or not, more focused on equality of outcome rather than caring one jot for the creatures they pretend to defend?

Until the animal rights posse show guts and protest publicly – in today’s PC climate – against the barbarism of cultures they would be brave to offend, surely they are nothing more than cowards in masks; as weedy-minded as commies and other ill-calibrated privilege-checkers.

Of course I may be wrong. Next week perhaps we will see a mass protest by Packham outside a Halal slaughterhouse? He will lose his BBC contracts overnight. I very much doubt he has the guts.