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The Smear Test

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BY DOMINIC WIGHTMAN

There are competent and then there are incompetent smears. I enjoyed an incompetent one recently from some animal rights wingnut who had informed an acquaintance of mine that I worked for my father who was an infamous arms salesman and sold rounds to terrorists in Syria. My acquaintance was surprised to find out that my father enjoyed a successful career as a corporate financier in the City and died almost fifteen years ago.

By contrast the Boris Johnson / Jennifer Acuri smear was rather a competent, calculated one. Boris has a bit of a Lloyd-George reputation with the ladies, Acuri’s a buxom blonde model who enjoys the public eye and pole-gyrating, while the idea of her benefiting business-wise from a Mayoral relationship is not beyond the realms of even a Socialist’s imagination. Inevitably, Acuri would defend herself, as she did, and therein the risks lay. Risks could easily be exploited by the smearers. As it was, Acuri’s eloquence covered all angles and she successfully defused the smear.

With a good smear the sizzle is often more important than the sausage. Sometimes reality is so far out it’s not smearable. The idea of Jeremy Corbyn and Diane Abbott oscillating the unmentionables is so far-fetched that it would make a terrible smear. Maybe it did. As Einstein noted, “reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

While smear campaigns have been identified as a common weapon of psychopaths, borderlines and narcissists – Tom Watson / Damian McBride’s Smeargate springs to mind – a good political smear is cheered in some circles. Take Momentum cadres and other headbangers on the Hard Left who, second only to watching pimple-popping videos, adore nothing more than a good smear. (For balance and a true reflection of British political life, the same can be said for neanderthals on the Far Right  – the actual Far Right, not the mass of the British population who lie somewhere to the right of Michael Foot on the left-right linear).

Those who cannot distinguish these smears, most often emanating from anonymous blogs or 4Chan posts (smears which should be worn by the victim as badges of honour), are either green, or prejudiced against the victim in the first place.

All of which takes me down a rabbit hole. A journey you luckily don’t need to accompany me on as I’ve been down there for you – to Byline, that echo chamber of tinfoilers and moonbat Cadwalladrites – on whose pages the writer and Twitterer Otto English conjured an incompetent smear on our Prime Minister last week.

Otto is a regular for Byline these days – no idea why he’d don the foil as he’s not actually as bonkers and blaring as his Remainiac Twitter persona seems. His smear on Boris was titled, “Spooking the Spooks”.

Quick précis – Otto’s smear goes something along the lines of this:

There is a bit more to Otto’s reportage – some paranoid nonsense doffing a cap to Hacked Off buffers about “pro-Boris” newspapers not covering the story. (This is Byline standard fare which thinks the globe has been corrupted by Facebook, big money and foreign interference. Mainstream outlets are not hostile back in the real world, they just think the Byline crowd are nasty, and lunatics. Byline – the online magazine rather than the summer torture camp – relies on much of its funding from people burned by the mainstream press).

Lebedev with a Change UK MEP candidate

I’ve read other Otto scribblings and they are better than this. This is a veritably crap smear.

Why?

For four reasons:

The question is never asked in Otto’s composition, who is the greater security risk, Corbyn or Johnson? After all, those are the only people who could be PM – Swinson only thinks she can.

Since the security services are not in the business of bumping off our political leaders – whatever said about the temperature of John Smith’s bath – who, as a spook, would you choose to have as your Prime Minister?

No brainer.

Boris is by far the safer bet. Life’s a trade-off (Sowell) and only a Utopian would expect a politician to be flawless. Boris having some downtime with a mate is fine. How does Otto know that Lebedev is not one of our’s?

If Otto’s smear actually named its sources and recognised that people become friends in the course of political life from across the house, and from all corners of this world, it would be more piercing. As it is, it merely provides sustenance for the echo chamber of conspiraloons and the 2+2=7 brigade that Byline tends to attract and suckle. The Russian angle is old hat – it has hardly worked well for the Democrats in the US. Since there is no recording, there is no smoking gun. Alas, like Katie Price’s assets these days, Otto’s article is way off granite. It fails the smear test. Two out of ten.

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