Why You Should Marry A Farmer’s Daughter

BY ANNA BOWEN

No really, you should.

  1. Chances are she can use a gun, whether its for game, vermin or clays. Only issue is that she may shoot straighter than you…
  2. Big machines won’t phase her.
  3. Nor will going fast on a quad bike with limited safety considerations.
  4. After a lifetime with a horse between her legs she has thighs of steel and a remarkable rising trot. Hee hee.
  5. Summer is for harvest, which means she’s unlikely to demand a holiday beyond a week’s skiing after Christmas.
  6. Cooking is a craft passed from mother to daughter. You will get fat.
  7. On a similar note she has been well- nourished and prepped for bearing sons. Read: child- bearing sons.
  8. No amount of education will drill out of her the importance of producing a male heir.
  9. Similarly she has a good understanding of inheritance and primogeniture.
  10. Anyone who has grown up on a livestock farm will be completely unfazed by blood and other gross things.
  11. The in-laws will live somewhere rural and scenic, ideal for a break…
  12. …Or dumping your children when they get too much and you fancy a few days in the remote Highlands.
  13. Multi- tasking is a prime skill.
  14. Calm in a crisis.
  15. She can do amazing things with baler twine.
  16. She can probably lift more than you.
  17. Farmer’s daughters always look good. Just take a look at the Queen of the crop- the Duchess of Rutland, who grew up on a farm in the Welsh borders. duchess-of-rutland-02
  18. She will never complain about things like getting her hair wet or her shoes muddy.
  19. Invites to crazy YFC parties and random barn dances.
  20. Oh and hunt balls.
  21. Homemade liquors and cordials etc. Even if her grandmother made them.
  22. Brothers who will join you on a shoot.
  23. And take you out in a tractor if that floats your boat.
  24. She will like dogs.
  25. And believe that cats should stay outdoors.
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