BY STEWART SLATER

Modelled on Jay Nordlinger’s “Impromptus” in National Review, I’ve written a piece which is a series of paras on various ideas:

• “This is not who we are” is a phrase habitually trotted out by politicians in the aftermath of some outbreak of mass criminality. It is also, of course, completely untrue. If it were not who we are, the event in question would not have happened. That it did means it is who we are. It is not, perhaps, who we should be or who we might wish to be.
• “Makes you proud to be British (or some sub-group thereof)” is a phrase often trotted out when the community comes together to repair the damage in the aftermath of whatever it was that was “not who we are”.  Just as nonsensical unless, of course, you think neighbourliness and compassion are uniquely British characteristics. Which might be news to the residents of Tokyo, Copenhagen, Little Rock and every other conurbation on the planet. A phrase which implies a familiarity with the wider world merely reveals an ignorance of it.
• Both expressions have been much in evidence on social media over the past fortnight. As have numerous posts announcing that the poster is “thinking of…” or “praying for” some group of worthy recipients. For, as well as our main source of information (“misinformation” if it is information we find uncongenial), social media has become the main way we tell the world that we are good people, who say the right things, and feel the right emotions. Even though, in most cases, no-one is listening except ourselves.
• Those with bigger platforms can use alternative methods to display their “right-feel”. Downing Street and the Palace of Westminster were lit in pink in tribute to the victims in Southport. Certainly novel, quite possibly mawkish. Restrained emotion is certainly no longer “who we are”. But how does this work? Are we now to light public buildings whenever there is a murder? Is it only in cases of multiple murder or child murder? Have we invented two-tier mourning?
• Nature abhors a vacuum and in the hollow of official pronouncements over Southport, rumours spread that the state was hiding details about the accused perpetrator. Rumours which were wrong. In a country in which 49% of the population thinks the head of government is ”untrustworthy”, it is not, however, too hard to see how such a situation might arise.
• Still, at least our politicians behave like adults. Across the pond, the Presidential election is a high school movie, re-enacted. Kamala Harris is one of the “Cool Girls”, clearly expecting everyone to be as excited by her elevation as she is herself while deciding what slang is acceptable (“fetch” might not be going to happen, but “brat” and “weird” certainly are). Tim Walz is the dweeby kid allowed to hang out with the Cool Girls, his devotion to them making him a willing factotum. Donald Trump is the rich kid with daddy issues. JD Vance is the one they worry is going to go postal.
• At times like these, light relief is needed and the Olympics have provided it. In part there is the thrill of victory, in part the thrill of discovery (who knew kayak cross was a thing and that we are good at it?), in part the transparent joy of many of the winners. And there is the transparent joy of Snoop Dogg, the hip-hop star reinvented as the games’ unofficial mascot, clearly living his best life as he goes from event to event dressed in participants’ attire. The $500,000 a day he is reputedly being paid probably doesn’t hurt either.
• Mr Dogg is, of course, not French. And while the games have been a great spectacle, they have also marked yet another French surrender. The bits of the Opening Ceremony which were French were old, the bits which were modern were “international”. Paris catacombs? Play The Phantom of the Opera. Need an animated section? Use The Minions. Want some French music? Get Lady Gaga or Celine Dion to sing it. Andrew Graham Dixon ends his series The Art of France in the 1960’s because the country hasn’t produced anything interesting since. It is hard to look at the City of Light this past fortnight and not agree with him. Unless you include Dad-Bod Smurf. And you really shouldn’t.
• Just to ram home the point, Tom Cruise is apparently to appear in the Closing Ceremony. In her later years, Elizabeth ceased to be Queen of Britain and became the global uber-celebrity, an instantly recognisable non-partisan figure who transcended nationality and was welcome across the world. Everyone wanted to be seen with her and everyone wanted her presence to legitimise their events. Cruise is her true heir – he gets invited to everything, goes everywhere and, beyond his Scientology, no-one knows what he thinks.  He is not even, in his movies outside Top Gun, particularly American (he has two British bosses and a partner of British/Swedish extraction in the Mission Impossible franchise). When he told Charles at the Coronation Gala that he could “be his wingman”, he wasn’t joking.
• The sport, however, remains refreshingly international. Saint Lucia won their first gold medal ever and the island erupted in a delightful spasm of joy (unlike Singapore which greeted its first with a collective shrug and grumble about how much it had cost to buy the athletes from China). Novak Djokovic completed his “Golden Slam” at the age of 37, joining Jimmy Anderson and Mark Cavendish as an argument for lengthening the time we think sportsmen can remain at the top. Sweden’s Mondo Duplantis raised the pole vault world record. By an entire centimetre.
• There was also, of course, disgrace. Charlotte Dujardin did not compete after footage emerged of her abusing a horse. Call me a cynic, but I would be surprised if this were the first time a rider had meted out such treatment to an animal. I would be equally surprised if the allegations currently engulfing Strictly are unique in the annals of dancing. More likely that we have preferred not to look for them than that they have never occurred. Most people are happy to eat sausages, few people choose to visit sausage factories.
• Changing abusive cultures can be hard. When bullying allegations swept through the Japanese stock-broking industry a couple of decades ago, deep bows were offered, tears were shed and change was promised. But the latter was slow to come. Middle management in particular resisted as they had, in their younger years, had to take the abuse and they felt they  were not being allowed enough time to give it.
• A man came to fix the freezer. He fixed the freezer and left. A phone-call came to ask if he had fixed the freezer and, if so, how well. Then an email came asking if he had fixed the freezer and, if so, how well. Feedback has become our new addiction. Whether standards have improved I leave up to you. (The freezer guy, to be fair, did a perfectly good job).
• An elegant turn of phrase from the FT on the Olympic 100m: “Thompson led until it mattered, Lyles led when it mattered”.
• Seneca often ended his letters with a quote, so have some Andre Gide on me: “Trust those who are seeking the truth, doubt those who have found it.“

Stewart Slater works in Finance. He invites you to join him at his website.