Yousurf, Matheson & Titillating Footie in Morocco

BY HAMISH GOBSON Humza Yousaf calling Suella Braverman “unfit for public office” seems to me to be a clear case of the pot calling the kettle white. Last Monday’s Herald reported our whiter-than-white First Minister, who thinks it wrong for Scotland to have so many “white” people in senior positions in public life, considers that no wrong was done when his Minister for Net Zero Moroccans, Michael Matheson, … Continue reading Yousurf, Matheson & Titillating Footie in Morocco

But Does the EU Want Scotland?

BY EFFIE DEANS In the Scottish Government’s latest paper An independent Scotland in the EU we learn that the SNP thinks that it would take between two to five years to join the EU. This is despite us learning that civil servants had previously warned that it could take up to eight years. The truth is that no one knows how long it might take for an independent Scotland … Continue reading But Does the EU Want Scotland?

Does Scotland Need More Migrants?

BY EFFIE DEANS The Scottish Government in its latest independence white paper expresses concern that Scotland’s population is aging and the birth rate is declining. It argues that migration is the sole driver of population growth and would like migration to increase. It therefore sets out various new visa schemes that an independent Scotland might adopt, would make it easier for asylum seekers and add … Continue reading Does Scotland Need More Migrants?

Yousaf, Jack & Chinese Emperor Gaozong of Qing

BY HAMISH GOBSON In 1910 the future President of the SNP wrote to a suffragette campaigning for women’s rights—an objective he strongly supported—saying: “Women should not forget that a ‘cause’ is the means whereby a politician is put into the position of being able to plunder the nation.” In 1936, when already President, he told a journalist that “politics is a matter of rich men … Continue reading Yousaf, Jack & Chinese Emperor Gaozong of Qing

The SNP is a Dwindling Band of Fantasists

BY EFFIE DEANS Like everyone else I did not pay much attention to the SNP conference which took place nearby me in Aberdeen. The turnout was poor with plenty of empty seats. But this isn’t the SNP’s main problem, nor indeed is Humza Yousaf. The real problem is Scottish nationalism has become a movement of fantasists. In 1989 two million people in what are now … Continue reading The SNP is a Dwindling Band of Fantasists

Fergus Ewing’s Witches Brew

BY HAMISH GOBSON In his play about Scottish politics, the prominent English opinion former, William Shakespeare, had “Three Witches” chant: “Fair is foul, and foul is fair: / Hover through the fog and filthy air.” The Witches were not identified, presumably on data protection grounds, but the Director of a recent production of “the Scottish play” made them look like women, though they all had … Continue reading Fergus Ewing’s Witches Brew

Beware the likes of Tintin Thunberg & Mrs Murrell

BY HAMISH GOBSON When Greta Thunberg won the Eurovision Sob Contest in 2019, she was the youngest winner of a major compassion tournie since Mother Teresa took gold at the Nobels in Oslo in 1979. Like the “crinklie of Calcutta”, the tear-jerking Swedelette was taken up by the great and the good as if she were a new health recipe. One of the first politicians … Continue reading Beware the likes of Tintin Thunberg & Mrs Murrell

A Bad Case of Narcissistic Imposter Syndrome?

BY HAMISH GOBSON The revelation that Sir Michael Parkinson suffered from “imposter syndrome” would have caused a flutter in the nationalist dovecote were all the doves not so narcissistic. Part of narcissism is factionalism because everyone has to resemble me. Narcissists cannot have allies, only disciples. That is a terrific weakness. The SNP illustrates this perfectly. Does Humza Yousaf suffer from a bad case of narcissistic imposter … Continue reading A Bad Case of Narcissistic Imposter Syndrome?

Angus ‘Jumbo on a Junket’

BY HAMISH GOBSON Robertson is no Charlemagne One of the pleasures of living on an affordable island like Great Todday is that you have time to read for pleasure beyond the river of woke fiction that flows out of the Edinburgh Book Festival these days. Older readers will recall that Peter Cook once referred to the event, in a perfectly clipped “Moarrningsaide accountant” accent, as … Continue reading Angus ‘Jumbo on a Junket’

The SNP Can Now be Decisively Defeated

BY EFFIE DEANS It’s now around 13 years since we last had a Labour Government. People in their twenties will barely remember it. In Scotland too we have had SNP Government since 2007. The days when Labour and the Lib Dems were in coalition are a distant memory even for those of us who do remember. Change is coming in both the UK and in … Continue reading The SNP Can Now be Decisively Defeated

Thongweed & Lugworms

BY HAMISH GOBSON Even the Archers’ lesbian kiss would be subject to Yousaf’s Legal Services Bill Our anti-affordable “government” in Scotland has been conspicuous by its silence in the matter of the first lesbian kiss to be broadcast on The Archers, the celebrated radio series which has been telling “an everyday story of countryfolk” since 1951. This happened on 10 August yet Humza Yousaf, who has … Continue reading Thongweed & Lugworms

Is the SNP motivated by Anglophobia?

BY EFFIE DEANS Penny Mordaunt’s appearance at the Fringe in Edinburgh proved controversial for her statement that the SNP’s approach to independence fails because it is based on bile and hatred. But who does the SNP hate? The answer would seem obvious. England. The English. But both the SNP and its supporters deny this vehemently. There are two main hatreds in Scotland. Anglophobia and Sectarianism. … Continue reading Is the SNP motivated by Anglophobia?

Like Mrs Murrell, High-End Humza Eats the Taxpayer

BY HAMISH GOBSON Hamish Gobson’s diary: the view from across the Uisge  AFFORDABLE GOVERNMENT will never come to Scotland so long as our leaders are carpet-baggers. While I was out on the rocks this spring quietly cutting fronds for political fortune-telling purposes, the Herald tells me that High-end Humza was gadding off to London for seditious purposes (talking to the EU Ambassador to the UK, for example) at … Continue reading Like Mrs Murrell, High-End Humza Eats the Taxpayer

Mrs Murrell Analysed from the Unabomber’s Chair

BY HAMISH GOBSON The death of the Unabomber last month may have been eclipsed in the Scottish media by stories such as Mrs Murrell’s success in her driving theory test, or squibs like her recent trip to the police offices, but out here on Great Todday we hold fast to traditional news values. “Is modern society fit for purpose?” has always seemed more important than “Is Mrs … Continue reading Mrs Murrell Analysed from the Unabomber’s Chair

The Upkilting of Humza

BY HAMISH GOBSON In Culloden month this year, Mike Nevin published an excellent and informed article analysing Evgeny Prigozhin’s future march on Moscow under the title: “Why the Jacobite Rebellion Failed”. What Mr Nevin seemed to me to be saying by Aesopian analogy was that Humza Yousaf does not have the legs for a march as far as Derby, which Bonnie Prince Charlie reached, much less to … Continue reading The Upkilting of Humza

Mhairi Black is the Reason the SNP Just Died

BY EFFIE DEANS With Labour closing the gap with the SNP to three points there is a real prospect of Scottish nationalism facing a God is dead moment. When Nietzsche wrote about the mortality of God, he was not of course suggesting that God had been alive and had then died. Rather he was saying that God had become a dead issue like believing in … Continue reading Mhairi Black is the Reason the SNP Just Died

Be Prepared!

BY HAMISH GOBSON Ian Mitchell’s recent book about Nicola Sturgeon (see below) concentrates on what he calls her “political personality”. This, to me, is another word for “character” in a public context. Anyone seeking to bet on how much longer Sturgeon would remain in Bute House could have done worse than to study the way she walks. This was one useful fact I derived from … Continue reading Be Prepared!