CSM EDITORIAL

Now that the history is out, there can be no doubt that the London Mayoralty, the Scottish Parliament and the Welsh Senedd were built to house Labour placers. Devolution was yet another New Labour ploy to perpetuate a gravy train for, and to quieten, their mates – not dissimilar to the placement of Labour cronies into quangos and charities. Now, like many of the outrageous PFI deals the Blairites signed us up to, and those dodgy get-out-of-jail free passes they handed to IRA villains, chickens have come home to roost.

Brexit Britain does not need all these divisive mayoralties – it needs to pull together. If sections of the UK want to pull away, they should be derided like those barmy Cornish separatists who bomb Rick Stein restaurants. Sturgeon is an avoidable and wasteful menace. Drakeford, the Welsh wet lettuce, also spends British money like water, while Red Khan in London serves to remind us all why Thatcher disbanded the loony GLC in 1986.

Abolish them all.

Save the British taxpayer a fortune.

Silence a whole bunch of third-rate politicians who have emerged to whine in Devolution’s wake.

Give some relief to the millions of Scots throughout the UK who have had enough of Mayor Sturgeon’s overt corruption and pathetic grandstanding. How they suck from the public teat! Force her and her lowlife, treacherous Scottish Nazi Party lackeys back into meritocracy where, if they are lucky, they’ll find themselves flogging cans of McEwan’s from the buffet counter on an Intercity 225. If they hate the Union Jack that much, no doubt some foreign land can be conned into offering them asylum as the freedom fighters they pretend to be, even if their beloved EU won’t. Stop their holding up of investment into Scotland with their continual misdirection play of independence with which they try to hide their shoddy record in local government.

Tackle the Labour-dominated Crachach at the knees with a Wilkinson spine-tingler. Switch the lights off at the Senedd and let Welsh people shine instead. Wales, like Scotland, has plenty to offer the UK and there’s no reason for a retarded Welsh Labour mafia – its lack of competence so exposed by the Senedd – to stifle at birth opportunities for new industry and entrepreneurship. The Senedd may be happy to waste thousands of taxpayers’ cash on the painful poetry of druid witches heard by one man and his poor dog – wouldn’t the Welsh people prefer a new tech hub, a fleet of trawlers or a series of university scholarships?

Meanwhile London has descended into the early 80’s GLC where schools were short of linoleum because so many cuts had been taken off rolls and now adorned the floors of GLC school inspectors’ kitchens. Sadiq Khan has become a spiteful troll who cares not a jot. He seems so distant from sentiment on the street, it would hardly seem ironic if he commissioned a statue of himself while sending his latest team of Taliban luddites to go topple a statue of Narcissus. Alas, the opponents he faces in upcoming elections are either self-absorbed fantasists or as gifted at leadership as Shaun the Sheep.

Boris can be a true great. Scots, Welsh and the rest of us mongrels imbued with the blood of these mighty nations – many now residing in England – will cheer him from the rooftops if he declares a date for the disbanding of the Welsh and Scottish ‘parliaments’ and the London Assembly. Put an end to this unnecessary devolutionary nonsense which promotes prigs and chaff – creating division where there should be none. The Tories could win over half the seats in Scotland at the next General Election on a disband-the-parliament ticket, especially now spineless Captain Hindsight, Kieth – perpetuating Labour’s painful, drawn-out suicide whilst on bended knee – is promoting yet more devolution in the UK. 

The buildings of these unnecessary mayoralties will make charming flats that can be sold at a handsome price, sending much needed revenues to the exchequer. There will be no need for the MSPs’ or the MS’s or London Assembly members’ exorbitant salaries – no need for their expenses, lowbrow scandals or tax-free bars. No need for flag arguments or pay-outs of half a million in taxpayers’ cash to set-up protagonists. Leave local issues to the councils – make being a councillor something more attractive and admired. Reform the Lords to be more locally representative – to be at all representative would be a start. Right now, we need more macro and less opportunity for expensive micro nonsense across the kingdom for it to be called ‘united’ again.

‘Ah but you’ll start a civil war’ the gutless will chirrup. Not a chance, although, tongue in cheek, re-invasion has its attractions, especially when bog-brush Sturgeon pops up on one’s television screen.

Scots would travel from all over to calm their clans – Welsh from all over to soothe their brothers. We’re all mongrels in these islands and should reserve petty nationalism, as we did quite happily for years, for Twickenham, Murrayfield and the Millennium stadium where we all stand an equal chance – where animosities ebb away afterwards helped on their way by barrels of Guinness, ale and whisky.

As for London? Far too busy getting on – far too little time for the current overdose of politics, which Devolution has foist upon all Britons without them ever asking for it. Just look at how few Londoners show up to vote in a Mayor.

Too much Democracy is bad for Democracy. Devolution is driving home this very point. So, let’s end it. In the name of Team GB. For unity of brothers, sisters and cousins spread across these islands – for the greater good. Less noise, more progress – Labour’s costly Devolution con has failed us and increasingly exposes them.