A Narrow Escape

BY LAURENCE FITZGERALD “I’ve had an epiphany,” said Blondie after one of her nights out, “It all makes sense now.”  This isn’t unusual after a night of heavy drinking, I’m sure you’ll agree – it’s that intoxicating mix of lack of sleep, still being pissed and the fractured carousel like recall of the previous evening – a merry-go-round of sticky table tops, streetlights and cackling … Continue reading A Narrow Escape

The Squall

BY DOMINIC WIGHTMAN There’s a ferry from Manila to Cagayan de Oro in Mindanao which takes a day and a half. On board, it’s mostly a pretty friendly vessel. Kids from Mindanaoan families mix quite happily with kids from Luzon. Adults queue at the restaurant kiosk and chat amongst themselves. Smokers congregate on deck and lend a tale and a light, while holiday-making students sip … Continue reading The Squall

Here’s One I Made Earlier

BY MANDY BALDWIN In the wake of the slaughter of innocents in Manchester last week, a teaching pack has been issued to schools to ensure that children don’t react healthily to events by developing a simple and strong moral sense that killing kids at concerts is unquestionably inexcusable. Let murder and mayhem break out all around us, let men who broke bread with – and … Continue reading Here’s One I Made Earlier

Siamese Fighting Fish: A Most Vital Illustration

BY DOMINIC WIGHTMAN Please, Dear Readers, take heed of these characteristics of the Siamese Fighting Fish (Betta splendens): Originally, they herald from the East. They have been bred to fight for many centuries. They often display very belligerent behaviour towards any animals that they deem a threat. Their breeding habits are messy – they are prone to physical and mental defects having been selectively over-bred between … Continue reading Siamese Fighting Fish: A Most Vital Illustration

Sacrificial Lambs

BY MANDY BALDWIN Well, it’s nearly midnight on Tuesday, and no doubt those who attended the vigil in Albert Square have gone home now, comforted and gratified by a show of togetherness. Candles were lit, the Union flag was beamed onto public buildings across the world, and a poet read an ode to the industrial revolution.  Some Guardian journalists became misty eyed about what they … Continue reading Sacrificial Lambs