BY DOMINIC WIGHTMAN In the rolling paddocks of motoring, where sleek German thoroughbreds once pranced and pretentious 4x4s posed, there now stands a singular monument to humble triumph. It is not polished (except by downpours). It smells vaguely of hawk and less vaguely of fart. It is ex-gamekeeper turned falconer and CSM columnist, Gary Baxter’s Dacia Duster, which has just lolloped, unburdened by vanity, past … Continue reading The Hare and the Duster
BY GARY BAXTER So, Dear Readers of Country Squire Magazine, it’s Sunday morning and I’m mucking about on the internet. I’ve just found out that some so-called “wildlife saviours” have decided they want to raise £25,000 fucking pounds to save curlews in just 6 FUCKING DAYS! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THESE CLOWNS FUCKING ABOUT WITH THINGS THEY KNOW NEXT TO NOTHING ABOUT! It’s nothing more than a massive, bloody … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER Right. The Scotch has been poured, the blood pressure is merely simmering instead of boiling over, so let’s have a look at what other masterstrokes of genius are being cooked up by the clipboard-wielding classes this week. You’d think they’d run out of ways to complicate the simple art of land management, but their capacity for nonsense is apparently limitless. First up, … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER As I sit here watching another bloody red kite circle over what’s left of the local songbirds, I decide to have a look at what fresh hell the pen-pushers in their air-conditioned offices have dreamt up for us this week. And Christ on a bike, it doesn’t take long to find it. Everywhere you look, it’s another scheme conjured by some millennial … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER I have had eeefuckinnough. This winter has done it for me. It’s not so much the weather either. So what erks me you ask? Tread mighty careful if you dare ask, as I am getting as growly as the Deputy Prime Minister’s ginger growler. So let me begin… North of the border an outbreak of oversized pussy cats in the hills. Who … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER The Editor has asked me to tone down my language as he’s been getting complaints so I’ll try and be more fucking careful in future. Just who the hell are these madmen who wish to release lynx into Northumberland and why? To what end? Are these people wanting them to help sort the deer population? Do you think they will be happy up … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER So, Dear Friends, it seems offgen offwatt or just off-whatever-they-want-to-call-the-bollox have finally come to their senses over Thames Water. The shareholders have told them to f off as well. ABOUT BLOODY TIME! Your clown of a CEO thought he could get away with the sewage pumping, or is it dumping? You thought your clients would foot the bill for your total incompetence. … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER You may think that my Notes from the actual countryside rants are nothing but rants but believe me they convey the true strength of feeling in the British Countryside. We really are getting more than just a little bit pissed off out here in the sticks! We are tired of the townie rabble. Chavs and spivs dressed up as ‘doctors’ or TV … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
BY GARY BAXTER As I sit in a hotel at Dartford near that poxy bridge watching traffic and more bloody rain falling I decide to have a look at social whatever they call it this week to find EVERY 6 ARTICLES that money grabbing lot the RSPB are busy rattling their tin for funds. This time with pictures of English Partridge and more claims our … Continue reading Notes from the Actual Countryside
